Today we celebrate a life! The life of Pamela Anne Flutot Ament. She was born on January, 7th, 1957 in Whittier, CA to Charles "Ed" Flutot, and Jean Crofutt Flutot. Ed and Jean had 4 daughters, Holly, Lisa, Pamela, and Carol.
The family lost Jean to Hodgkin's disease while Pam was attending Jr High. This disrupted and devastated them greatly. Pam never graduated from High School, but later earned her GED.
She met the love of her life, Duane Ament, at East Whittier Jr. High, where Duane says he fell in love with her the moment he saw her standing by the snack shack. They dated, but went their separate ways when Pam left school following her mother's death.
Pam and Duane eventually married others. Duane had a son, Cory, born in 1978, while Pam had Lottie-Jean, born 1974, Melinda in 1979, and Scott in 1981. Pam and Duane met again in 1983. After filing for divorce, Pam and the kids were staying with her father Ed in Whittier. She decided to call Duane's parent's home in hopes of finding him. When Duane got the message, he immediately recognized the name and number. He called Pam back, almost unable to dial the number fast enough. When he learned of the divorce he said, "Don't move, I'll be there in 20 minutes". He wasn't going to let her slip away again. Pam made that call March 23rd 1983.
Coincidentally, it was March 23rd 2010 (27yrs to the day) when Pam and Duane shared their last night together. During that evening Duane sat Pam up in her bed. Something about the look in her eyes caused him to break down. They cried together for a while, sharing an important moment of connection. They talked honestly, and comforted one another as they spent the evening together.
The rest is a history of a 26 year marriage of love, shared passions, and a battle of "who can be more stubborn". They were married on October 15th 1983, the same day they moved to Bakersfield. In 1984, Pam gave birth to her 4th child, Jason Thomas.
Pam and Duane raised four children together. Cory works as a mechanic and is married to Sara. They live in Arizona with their two children Tyler and Justin. Melinda is married to Aaron and they live in San Luis Obispo. She finished her Master's Degree in 2008 and is currently working as a clinical psychologist. Scott is a mechanic by trade, but has many skills. He and Samantha have been together for 9yrs. They live here in Bakersfield and are currently renovating their newly purchased home together. Jason also lives in Bakersfield and has several real estate projects. He is a manager at the Crystal Palace, as well as an entrepreneur. He is engaged to be married to Alli on November 13th 2010. All of Pam's kids carry on her love of music, nature, food, and chocolate!
Pam had a life-long love of music, which began at age seven. She learned to play 12-string guitar to accompany her amazing singing voice. In one of her published poems she credited her craft to her mother Jean, who taught her music and John Lennon for his inspiring mind. Pam and Duane recorded an album together in addition to many other recordings she made over the years. She was a prolific song, story, and poetry writer, which her family and others continue to cherish and enjoy.
Her love of nature also began as a young girl. Her family loved to take camping trips to Joshua Tree in the Mojave Desert. This love of camping carried over into her adult years, which she shared with the family she made. She loved the wild flowers that bloomed near home each spring, and was always up for hunting mushrooms, which she sometimes used in her home-cooked meals. She was known for her amazing sourdough bread and the love, care, and time she spent preparing meals for her family.
Pam was quite an accomplished poker player. She participated in tournaments in Las Vegas, and loved to play online. She also loved classic cars. One of her prized possessions was her 1992 Jaguar sedan. When son Jason began dating Alli, he borrowed the Jag to take her out. As Jason opened the door for Alli, she bent down to pick up a leaf lying on the floorboard to discard it. Jason said, "No, please leave the leaves. They are some of my mom's favorite things. She loves to surround herself with Nature whenever she can, even while driving!" She always kept dried flowers on the dashboard. It was her way of bringing Nature into her everyday life. On a nice day, she would drive to the wildflowers and be where she felt most at home, in Nature.
She was a musician, mother, homemaker, artist, naturalist, idealist, and rebel.
Pam was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis around the age of 35. She was stubborn and determined not the let the disease slow her down. She poured herself into her passions. She also loved to read, do crossword puzzles, write, create recipes, and play Nintendo. You could often find her in front of the fireplace with her favorite blanket, (which she crocheted), stoking the fire. She was known for her radiant and full smile and loved spending time with family and close friends.
As time progressed, so did the MS, but she didn't let that stop her. She could smell chocolate from a distance and enjoyed the benefits of the cooking skills and creations she passed down to her son Jason. Of course, she was the official "taste-tester". A chocolate cake never lasted more than a day with her sweet tooth. She was full of knowledge and stories that you could sit and listen to for hours. Its true, there was a little BS thrown in for good measure, but man, she was just cool!!!!
She cherished watching "That 70's Show" with Duane and loved old Classic movies. She knew many of the answers to "Who wants to be a Millionaire" and "Jeopardy" and had no problem telling the contestants on TV they weren't getting it right. She always encouraged her kids to "look it up" if we didn't know the meaning of a word, she never let us get away with ignorance. She was and will always be a beautiful person, inside and out.
My mom put up a brave fight, but lost her battle to MS. Though she did not push it on others, her faith in Jehovah was very strong. She believed so strongly, that she once refused a blood transfusion and almost bled to death. She was oftentimes frustrated and saddened by Society and Mankind's injustices. Many of her songs ask why we cannot see all of Nature's beauty. She believed that when she left this existence she would one day enter into Jehovah's "New System". There she would once again be reunited with all of the people she loved in a world of beauty and peace. She awaits that time with her mother Jean and Father Ed.
Today we celebrate a Life…. The life of Pamela Anne Flutot Ament. A life well lived, full of potential, love, friendship, kindness, and especially, good old fun.
This is a prayer which was sent to the family.
"I have lost one I love, Lord, and the profound emptiness I feel is unbearable at times. In those moments, I know you are with me, but it may be a while before I can sense your comfort and care. Meanwhile, please keep me safe as I grieve- as I question, as I rage, as I weep, as I sit in silence- waiting to heal and feel whole and alive again."
If anyone would like to share a memory or thought, please, we are open to it now.